Happiness

I’m feeling a bit philosophical today, perhaps since I watched the end of a great TV show’s second season. It inspired some thoughts in me.

I’m sure someone’s said this before, but I believe that what we do when no one's watching is what defines us. We’ve got friends and family, coworkers and people we meet at the supermarket. But when it comes down to it, we all end up alone sometimes. We break up with people, we lose people, and some of us aren’t charismatic enough to make many friends. Sometimes, everyone’s busy, and we have time to ourselves, and we feel lonely.

It’s how we use this time that counts. We need time to get to know ourselves. To heal our bodies and minds. To believe in ourselves, get through the hard times, and make our dreams come true. I don't mean to sound cliche. When times are hard, do we have the strength to pick ourselves up? Make ourselves happy again? Do something meaningful? And I don’t mean we have to change the world. Doing whatever simple thing we love to do can be meaningful. Sometimes we can only depend on ourselves, and if we appreciate ourselves enough, we can make it. And we can make anything happen.

Appreciating the little things can help make us happy again. "That first sip of hot tea on a cold morning," to quote Owen from Torchwood. Our favorite stories, be it book, movie, or TV. Favorite foods. Writing, talking, dreaming. Places we love. This world is really a beautiful place. We just have to realize it once in a while.

Photo: One of my favorite things to do. Sit on the beach and watch the ferry come in and out, breathe in the salty air, and appreciate life.

Disbelief

Eleven o'clock this morning, I wrote the last word of the first draft of my novel. About 300 pages, and 87,000 words. I didn't even plan it to be a certain length, but my goal was at least 300 pages, and I got there. I seriously can't believe it. For some reason I remember starting it in August, but I can't think exactly what year. My guess is it's been over three years. I took a few long breaks, but I knew eventually it would be done. And now it is.

For so long, it's been something on the backburner. "I'm writing a novel," I'd tell people. But it never quite felt true, I never felt like I'd accomplished much, until I realized how many pages I'd written. But it was always unfinished. Now, draft one is done. I'm not saying the story is set in stone now; it certainly isn't. It's what my teacher's assistant said last year, a "shitty first draft." They always are that way, and if you can't get over that, you'll get stuck trying to make it perfect the first time. I've put the mess of ideas in my head to paper, and started organizing it into a coherent story. Finishing any sort of writing thing for me is a big deal, since like so many other writers, it's hard for me to end things. I get bored of the story, or get stuck, and I get another idea and start writing something else. This time, I stuck to it, and got it done. I've got to treat myself somehow today. Maybe a nice Starbucks mocha, or a trip to the bookstore, or a new notebook. Something.

I think I'll take the advice of my creative writing teacher last term and put the manuscript aside for a while, now that it's done. Let the ideas bounce around in my head for a few months. Maybe I'll start the second draft during the summer. My work is in no way over. But I've come to a major milestone.

Photo: A man was flying kites at the beach yesterday, and I snatched a few pictures. Spring is certainly on its way! Though, I wish we'd gotten more snow this year. Call me crazy, but next year I'll make a point of it to be somewhere cold over the winter.

Starstruck

I don't quite know why, but I've been a bit of a fangirl lately, thanks to my friend who introduced me to Doctor Who. It's brought up my old desire to travel to Scotland or Ireland or England or somewhere awesome over there on the British Isles... one day, mark my words, I'll get there! Anyway, if you haven't heard of Doctor Who, or have but haven't watched any episodes, I highly recommend it, especially the seasons with the 10th doctor, David Tennant. What a cute little Scottish bloke... and so, so sad I had to get into the show after he leaves it.

I'm also following Neil Gaiman on twitter (@neilhimself), and enjoying it. He's such a great author (please, please read American Gods, it's brilliant), and these days he's winning all sorts of awards and doing all kinds of cool geeky things. For example, meeting Felicia Day (star of The Guild another must-see if you haven't), and possibly, eventually, writing an episode of Doctor Who... I really need to start reading some of his other stuff, like The Sandman. I mean to try to do that over the coming break. When I'm not writing my own fantasy stories, of course.

Photo: I haven't been able to take many pictures these days, so I'll give you a little snapshot of all the Doctors over the years. David Tennant is the one on the left, in the middle.

Making The Day Better, And A Writing Update

Last Monday wasn't a good day. Started out with a bad dream, then various annoying things happened all day including not having my iPod charged and forgetting my umbrella, until the day got better in the evening when I finally got to watch my Monday night TV shows, namely Chuck, 24, and Heroes. Today, it's different. I woke up to go get a cinnamon roll at the cafeteria, and checked my mail to find the coat I'd ordered quite a while ago finally arrived. Despite the fact that I have a quiz today and I had to do errands during my two-hour break, I treated myself to a Japanese lunch. Plus, tonight I get to watch my favorite shows again. Lesson: if you ever fear (or even think you know) you will have a bad day, make it good. It's possible.

This weekend I had some extra time, but instead of writing I listened to a radio show on BBC Radio 2 hosted by David Tennant and Catherine Tate. They're brilliant. But because I seem to not have motivation every weekend, and next week I have midterms, I'm putting off writing until my winter break (extended a week because of the Olympics!), when I don't have other things to do or distract me. I'm so close to the end of my first draft that I am setting a goal to finish it over the break.

Photo: A lovely picture I took a while ago of my favorite sushi... unagi. Eel, for those of you who don't speak sushi.